Month: May 2016

Iron Man: We’re murdering a fuck ton of civilians, we need regulation.

Captain America: Get your government hands off my superhuman enhancements!

Iron Man: Bruh. The government is what enhanced you in the first place.

Cap: I love you, Bucky! Never let go!

Despite not being like the comic hardly at all, Civil War was wildly entertaining. Action scenes were amazing, Bucky was angstier than a sixteen year old goth, and this movie will totally revive the Spider-Man franchise.

Grievances:

• Baron Zemo wasn’t really Baron Zemo, he was just some butthurt Sokovian
• No concrete arguments were given for opposing registration
• No Stamford Incident (and therefore no Penance, the best comic book character ever)
• Needed more death

Good on them for making Redwing a robot; Falcon’s psychic link to birds is ridiculous.

 

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